Chuckles

Stella can make Tiger laugh like no one else.

Marine Ball Manila 2009

Me and Sara at the ball, apparently teal was this year's color. Eight women wore teal...if this were a gossip magazine there would be the question of who wore it best. Luckily it is not a gossip magazine.

Steve and Courtney. Courtney also got her dress designed by Oliver, she looked great.

Seth and I had the chance to go to the Marine Ball for the first time. I was too sick with pregnancy to go last year.

My dress was designed by Oliver Tolentino, a Manila based designer who has since moved to LA and opened his shop on Melrose Ave. He was at LA fashion week this past October and is probably too famous to be designing dresses for me, but I get grandfathered in and he made me a dress anyhow (I am getting my final dress made right now for our next event in December). I love the fashion scene in the Philippines because you have a chance to get to meet some great designers and the cost of one-of-a-kind pieces are about the same as you would find in the US for the factory clone clothes. If you get a chance to come here you should definitely take advantage of getting some clothes custom made.

The Marine Ball was so much fun. Unlike working events, all of my friends were there and everyone was dressed up. It was like the prom for grown-ups, except it was actually fun.

Stella loved my dress, she told me she wanted to wear her princess dress and come along. She has been a doll lately. She can get her baby brother to laugh so hard. From the beginning they have had a connection and as they grow it is so much fun to see them become friends.

My Julie

I skipped a major part of my blogging life in the past few months. The 2 of you who read this blog have noticed. I skipped the wedding of Julie Ferrell, now Farrell.

Julie has been my best friend for pretty much my entire rational years of life. We met in 6th grade and were inseparable all through high school. She has always been my go-to friend, the best listener, a tiny girl with a major back bone if necessary.

Julie married Tim, her long time boyfriend in a beautiful wedding. We traveled across the world to see her wedding, 26 hours from door to door with two kids in tow under two-and I would have gone further if it meant I was able to see my best friend get married.

My favorite things about Julie are (in no particular order):

• She is really smart, she gets things that stupid people don't
• She laughs at the best times, and hard, and her laugh makes me laugh
• She stands up for what is right
• She loves her family, flaws and all and is about the most patient person in the world
• She loves my family, especially my kids, and that makes me love her even more
• She looks great in everything, seriously not fair, when we were fake Limited Too models in the window (yes, we did that, horrifying to admit now), Julie always looked great in everything
• She is always up for a good project and a good time
• She is sneaky for good
• She knows how to keep a secret
• She makes all of her best friends feel like her best friend (although I know that I am her REAL best friend)
• You can go months or even a year without talking and it doesn't change your relationship with her

Miss you Jules!

Halloween Marathon

This was Stella's third Halloween and Tiger's first. We are getting to be quite the haloweenathoners. In the past two weeks we have been to six Halloween parties. SIX. In that time Stella has gone through her lady bug costume and her ballerina costume. She thinks she is pretty awesome in them, and she is.

My favorite Halloween parties were those who understood what Halloween is about, the Americans. The trick-or-treating, the pumpkins, the costumes. They get it. Although the metro-Manila area attempts to do Halloween, they sorta miss the mark. This is our second Philippines Halloween and they just can't let the show go. They can't get away from the Karaoke style party. Screaming into a microphone with speakers that go to 11, entirely too scary costumes for young kids, and games that are really only appropriate for older kids if not teenagers (I about lost my sanity when they had a game that tested who could say Halloween the longest into an ear bleeding loud microphone, the average time to say Halloweeeeeeeeeeeeeen, 51 seconds, multiply that by 15 and you can see how I wanted to go into the grave myself). The idea of a Halloween party at the few Filipino parties I went to is sitting for two hours in a chair and watching a show. Sigh. I even volunteered to help plan it but they rejected my offer. I admit if there is one thing this American knows, it is Halloween.

The highlight of our Halloween marathon was Tiger winning the most creative costume at the embassy party. Ambassador Kenney was delighted when she saw him dressed as a lizard: fingerless gloves, a hat, booties, he was decked out. Our reward: $4 to Krispie Kream doughnuts. This was a particular boost to me because I had to break up with a the seamstress that does a lot of the expat sewing. I asked for a lizard costume and she gave me a shirt and shorts in scaly material. So I ended up making a hat myself with hot glue and some gloves that covered his hand but not his fingers, a thumb suckers delight.

Poverty

I knew before I came to the Philippines I was going to have a hard time with the true poverty here. I am not talking food stamps poverty where people live on $16,000 a year, I am talking about the poverty where people make less than $200 a year and have babies, and live in shanty squatter villages.

This past week I took Stella to a toddler mommy type class. The class was held at a local church in the area. As we walked out of the class the people came, and they came like zombies. "MAAAAAAAM" this one women (I think but not quite sure) who was emaciated wearing tattered clothes, carrying her glass bottle covered by a bag with glue for sniffing inside, came towards me begging for money. I had my two-year old daughter and she looked too high to realize that I was in mother lion mode, not feeling charitable when my daughter's safety was in danger. "MAAAAAAAAAM" she said again (ironically she was wearing a Dolce and Gabana pirated hat), and then more glue kids came-all with bottles covered in paper bags. The little ones were coming near my legs and I started to get really nervous. I picked my daughter up to protect her and made the sign for, no money. They ignored my sign and the got aggressive. With Stella in tow I started to make a scene. In that second my driver showed up and dispersed the crowd. We rushed into our car and left.

Poverty is not something new to this country but in the last month we have been hit with four typhoons. The people living in the shanty towns have had their homes destroyed four times in a month. Begging has always been here but this last week it was scary. The social cues were ignored, there is a desperation in the air.

Growing up in Florida, I am not a stranger to hurricanes. However, the preparations for hurricanes are not done here. At home with the oncoming of a category 2 hurricane we would tape windows and doors, fill bathtubs with water and hunker down. Here we just try to sleep through the wind and hope your windows don't explode.

Living here is so familiar and similar to home in so many ways. Our friends here are like family and help me feel like I am not so far from home. Yet, the extremes are so extreme. The people who are wealthy here are so incredibly wealthy, yet the poor are so poor there is a panic in their eyes. Although the Philippines is so familiar in many ways, it is still very foreign.

Columbus Day Fish Foot Fetish

I love living in the Philippines and having both American and Filipino holidays. It is especially fun since the Philippines declares new holidays all of the time.

.For Columbus day we went to the Manila Ocean Park Aquarium. It is really a nice place and exhibit. Afterwards we tried out a fish spa and had little fishies eat our feet. Seth and Stella were too ticklish to be able to handle it but I got into a zen mode and let them eat the tops of my feet (the bottom is just too sensitive)

In other news, like his big sister, Tiger has sprouted two bottom teeth at four months old. My kids just are in a hurry to grow up. He has been so sweet but a little whiny so it is nice to have a reason for the fuss.

You guessed it

This is the next clue.

Floods, Typhoons, Maids, and Chocolate

There has been so much going on in the past few days/weeks that I have had a hard time making myself blog. I feel like Facebook is the meth of the computer world. It is cheap and easy but not good, and it wastes you. Facebook has been taking all of my time neglecting the high art of blogging.

The past two weeks the Philippines has been spanked mother nature. When we heard there was a typhoon coming we did not think much of it. The Philippines is constantly getting hit by typhoons that usually turn out to be nothing. So when we woke up to rain we though that our maid was over reacting when she advised us not to leave the house. But it didn't stop raining, and it started raining harder. If it wasn't for a serious Stella tantrum we might have gotten stuck like many of our friends.

It was the most rain in 40 years. The road outside our home turned into a lake and within minutes our pool somehow became poop brown, not a coincidence.

Despite our condo having several stories above us before the roof we still had strange leaks in the middle of the house. Other than that we were fine. Sadly, the majority of people in Manila were not as lucky. Everyone was at least wet and many lost a lot more. Food, clothes, appliances were the minor losses. There were more than 200 people killed and certainly now the flood is taking its toll as the water has still not drained and is now filled with waste.

Stella and I scourged the house to help donate to the relief effort. She loved going through her old clothes and shoes and putting it in the box so that "kids who have no clothes or shoes can borrow them and have clothes" (clearly we are working on our concepts of borrowing and giving). It was precious to see such a young child understand basic Christian principles of love thy neighbor. Children have empathy at a much younger age than most adults give them credit.

The next week that followed was a mess. We tried out a new helper that was just didn't work. A red flag went off the first day when I came into the room to find her and Stella doing glitter glue on my carpet. When asked why she did it on the carpet she blamed Stella. There were other harbingers but after one week I didn't need any more and she was finished.

Upon the announcement that we were not going to keep her on, our maid of one year quit. Apparently she was planning on not coming back when we paid for her vacation and flight to her province. She came back anyhow but was just not excited about work. More days off and money did not give her incentive to stay and so in one day I lost all my maids.

It feels wonderful! I know that a lot of people who read this blog dream and imagine how awesome life would be to no longer do dishes or laundry, and I admit I love not doing dishes or laundry, but to have your house to yourself. Sigh. It is a breath of fresh air. Now back to the business of finding a replacement.

Oh, and we know where we are going next. The title is a clue. Leave your comment as to where you think are going next. If you guess right you are entitled to a waffle when you come and visit us.

Flotsam

While we've been playing, this blog has been a little fallow. Apologies to all, in the form of this post and more to follow.

Presenting Back to the Fowlture with Christopher Lloyd Duck and Stella:

Stella lived to save the day. With Rock and Roll!

How to Overcome Jetlag with Small Children

The above title is what I put into my google search and got a whole lotta nothing. Either I need to get better with my search engine skills or someone needs to write the truth about jetlag and small kids.

This post is to all the people who know what REAL jet lag is. I am not talking daylight savings or LA to NYC jet lag. I am talking the other side of the world where the sun doesn't shine.

So, you have to travel to the other side of the world? My first advice would be to not take the kids. Children are not made to go from day to night and night to day in 24 hours. They are scheduled beings that respond to consistency and the sun rising and setting around the same time every day. I realize, myself included, that leaving your dependents is usually not an option so here is the facts that you have to face.

• You children will cry, a lot. They will be crabby. We have been home now for four days and our children are still a wreck (15 hour time difference). There have been many tears, tantrums. Just expect it.
• Do NOT attempt to overcome jet lag for yourself. Since you will be getting up in the middle of the night every day (night), don't even bother to get over jetlag. Treat the jetlag child like a new born and sleep when they sleep. It is okay to be envious the other parent who has to go to work and has to get over jetlag and sleeps more than 4 hour stretches.
• You have two choices to get the kids onto your time zone: more sleep or less sleep. I like the idea of more sleep but in practice with kids under 2 this is not an option. I have heard of friends who give their kids benedryl until they are on schedule. Benedryl doesn't work on my toddler and sorta creeps me out, so for her health, I am having her go the sleep deprivation cycle.
• With the sleep deprivation cycle your child will wake up the middle of the night. Instead of freaking out and forcing them to be a normal human and go back to sleep, just get up with the kid, give them some food, and let them play. For me this has been my morning every day at 2 or 3 am.
• The trick is from this point on, to keep them up. Allow a nap around 11 or 12 and let them sleep 2-3 hour MAX. Wake them up (usually a bath helps get them out of the serious grog). They will be grouchy.
• Be sure they eat a dinner because often they wake up at 2 because they are hungry.
• Keep them up until 7 or 8 and then put to bed.

So to all the parents out there who feel like they are in a sleep deprivation torture program, my heart goes out to you. Good luck.